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Archive for March, 2011

Dorkly Bits: Angry Birds Friendship

Those green pigs and those birds, are they so different after all? Maybe the whole egg stealing thing was just a massive misunderstanding and they were just borrowing them to keep them safe. I’m sure that was it.

Yeah, they’re all just trying to live in a precariously constructed world that’s really as fragile as all our own. There’s a lesson to be learned here, humanity would do good to look at how these two disparate sides come together in their shared experiences. It’s…it’s beautiful, man.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.31.11 | Games, Humor, Videos | 1 Comment

Radiohead Fan Speaks Out

Yeah, it’s OK for Thom Yorke to fling himself about like he was made of limbs and nothing else, without a care in the world. He thinks he’s so clever, like he’s beyond criticism or something.

Well, finally those people who thought the post-OK Computer albums were, frankly, a little bit shit and unlistenable, have a place they can meet, laugh, joke, and openly discuss how crap they really were.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.30.11 | Humor, Music, Videos | 1 Comment

Super Slow-Motion Motion

Your first thoughts will be why are these mime artists moving so slowly, have they slipped through a temporal wormhole into another reality where time…ticks…really…slowly? But there’s reason behind their snail-like incremental movements—and it’s not just to freak stoners out.

It’s so you get to watch the world whizzing past them, a bit like Neo in the Matrix, if Neo was in an art collective that looked like a bunch of circus rejects.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.30.11 | FTW!, WTF? | Comment

Muslamic Ray Guns – The EDL Anthem

Now there’s nothing wrong with a rainbow society that celebrates the varied cultures of this multifarious earth that we all inhabit. But the line has to be drawn at Muslamic ray guns. What next, shooting concentrated Sharia law lazers from their beards and Jihad from their eyes?

It’s well know that the EDL have one single brain cell that they distribute amongst their members on a time share basis, but ray guns? They could be onto something here. Maybe they should all go work for Fox news, it sounds like the sort of dedicated investigative journalism that channel is championed and admired for.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.29.11 | Humor, Music, Videos | 1 Comment

Mommy’s Nose Is Scary Movie Trailer

There was a sound so scary, not even a hardass cyber-marine made from titanium who shat bricks of fear and ate death for breakfast could stand to hear its repulsive noise.

This is the film of that sound and how it came to be from the mouth of one mother, a mother who thought nothing of issuing it forth in front of her infant child. More terrifying than Alien, more gut-wrenching than Saving Private Ryan.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.28.11 | Humor, Videos | 1 Comment

We Ruined This Bar (Ke$ha Parody)

Yeah, those Kesha clones are a real drag, getting glitter in your beer and generally staggering about and treading on your foot and stuff with high heels. Her annoying pop guff has a lot to answer for.

They’re whiner and annoying and they won’t even put out, which would make the whole thing OK. Instead we all have to suffer, the best way to deal with it is to drink more beer. Glitter-free, hopefully.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.25.11 | Humor, Music, Videos | 1 Comment

Commentator Sex Problem

If Clive Tyldesley lived inside your nipple, you can’t even begin to imagine the embarrassing possibilities when you’re trying to get all romantic with a hot babe. It’s a little known affliction that effects 0.001% of the population and the consequences are devastating.

Most sufferers are too embarrassed to even talk about it openly in public, so they suffer in silence. Well they would suffer in silence if it wasn’t for the constant drone of Clive Tyldesley’s voice coming from your nipple. And as for Andy Gray in your minge. Well…

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.24.11 | Humor, Videos | 1 Comment

Two Dogs Dining in Busy Restaurant

What? You never seen two dogs dining in a busy restaurant before? Except, this restaurant sounds busy but doesn’t look it. Maybe the people dining are tiny people too small to see with the naked human eye.

But back to the dogs, they love dining out; the atmosphere, the crowds, the conversation. And they’re great company, but don’t leave the table to go to the toilet with an unfinished plate. By the time you get back there won’t be any food left. Dogs are big on greed.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.23.11 | Humor, Videos | 1 Comment

Guilty!

OK, who’s eaten all the kitty cat treats? Time for some third degree to find out the guilty party. Interrogating dogs must be a new low for this guy. That is until one of them pulls a face that makes it look like an extra from an Aphex Twin video.

It looks disturbing to say the least. If it pulled that face near me I’d happily let it eat all the treats it ever want until it passed out from greed.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.22.11 | Humor, Videos | 1 Comment

Bless You

Beware, you are about to enter a world that exists within another world inside a cocoon of worlds known as the meta-parody. You think it’s a piss take against Jesus and all those God-botherers but then some dude comes on and starts singing about God-haters.

It’s all so confusing. Can’t we just hate everything and have done with it? Just a general sceptical hatred for all religions and belief-systems the world over?

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.21.11 | Humor, Videos | 1 Comment

Cheap Flights

Be mindful of those cheap flight bargains. You think you’re getting a deal for 50p, but just step back for a minute. 50p? That’s less than a pack of crisps. Something’s up, the small print! Read it.

And you’ll find out that they charge £300 for credit card bookings, £1000 for luggage, an arm for booking fees, a leg to book in early. And your soul for the privilege of booking seats together. Fecking feckers.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.18.11 | Humor, Videos | 1 Comment

Bottom – Gas Man

You must remember that episode of Bottom where they club the gas man to near death for trying to intrude upon their home and undertake such heinous crimes as trying to read their gas meter. HOW. VERY. DARE. HE.

It was one of the best episodes, subtly portraying the urban angst of living with Rick and Vyvyan from The Young Ones when they’re all grown up. But there was always one thing missing, why was there never a song made from splicing the episode together with some techno beats? Well now that feat has been achieved.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.17.11 | Humor, Tv & Movies, Videos | 1 Comment

Hotel Hell Game

Time to get all ‘Hotel California’ and repeat the mantra, “You can check in, but you can never leave”, which is true in your case because you are running the place. Keep the demanding guests happy at ALL costs!

It might sound like a pretty weird basis for a game but it is strangely addictive as your hotel fills up and your guests get evermore demanding (what do they need all those batteries for?) and angry – good luck! — Click HERE to play.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.17.11 | Games, Nerdocre | Comment

PonyCraft 2

It was a time when a children’s cartoon about magic talking ponies became an epic opera across the infinity of space. My Little Pony has never sounded so badass.

But that’s what happens when you synch My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic (awww) with the StarCraft 2 cinematic launch trailer. You get the power of awesome.

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Posted by: wesbo | 03.16.11 | Games, Humor, Tv & Movies, Videos | 1 Comment
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