This crazy explorer left over from Britain’s colonial days when we’d bullwhip foreigners for their insolence and stride across strange lands to bring them the joys of scones, proper manners, and queuing, raps about the brown liquid that fuelled the empire: tea.

British people love a cup of tea, they love it more than their dear old mums, they love it so much while slaughtering savages in unholy lands they’d pause mid-battle to drain a brew.