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Those auto-tunin’ mofos the Gregory Brothers get their shawwwtie chops round this whole Charlie Sheen thang. They might be a bit late to the party, but to use Charlie’s vernacular they’ve followed the right directions and are epic bi-winning.
They must have tiger brains that bang 7 gram Martians from another terrestrial realm. In the kingdom of win, Charlie Sheen is the many-headed king.
When it came to God dishing out impressions of rabid dogs that could frighten the terminator, this guy was first on the list. Not content with just explaining the story he practically turns into the dogs in question in some kind of method acting metamorphosis.
And just look at his long-suffering wife. Pushed aside as he gets caught up in his intense performance. In makes you wonder, maybe this man is actually a dog impersonating a human. Reerarararererarae!
When it comes to earth-destroying weapons, the sort that could annihilate a city just by flying past it and shouting “Boo!”, they’re usually quite high up on the badass scale. Let’s say very nearly all the way up to eleven.
But this nuke isn’t quite getting the whole terrifying, world shattering vibe that should be its default setting. And as for the mushroom cloud, it’s more like a pink penis cloud.
WINNING!!! We’re all winning now because the internet is full to the brim with Charlie Sheen winning and snorting 7 gram rocks up his eyeballs. You can’t search for a cat video or some pr0n without Charlie rearing his manic head.
And so it goes. Here’s the celestial being himself with that other popular Charlie of cultural memeage. Charley from those infomercials. Someone needs to mix the Prodigy track “Charley Says” with Mr Sheen in. We’re see who’s winning then.
Just because a lady likes her cat, doesn’t mean she’s crazy cat lady. But cats can be jealous creatures, fuelled by envy that someone is taking the attention away from them and their cute little existence.
So what do they do? Well they act is what they do. They act to stop that interloper coming into their cosy life and pushing them out of the picture. And this here is the evidence. Those conniving little shits.
The nation’s sweetheart and first Geordie to ever leave Newcastle, she’s now so famous you can’t get out of bed without bumping into one of her many clones that roam the British countryside looking for an angry fix.
So what better tribute to such a shining example of towering intelligence and workhouse ethics than this 47 second clip. She shoots, she scores, she gets cheated on by a hairdresser.
If you saw Gaddafi frothing at the mouth amongst the ruins of Tripoli waving his green book about like a mad gorilla made of plastic, then you may have thought, “What on God’s earth?”.
It’s the sort of insane behaviour that is crying out for someone like Charlie Brooker to chew over with his scathing wit. And, thankfully, he did.
The queen of Radio 4 turns into an alien queen, of sorts, by birthing a blood-coated fleshy monster live on national TV, while Sigourney Weaver looks on with affection. And it’s a pretty impressive feat.
But then, that’s what years of working on the “sound of middle England” does for you. It’s a great training ground for all sorts of alien breeding. And to find out about cheese-making in Berwick-upon-Tweed.
